Some scars take their time to fade...



In happier times-when turning the door handle lead to adventure

 Up until a few weeks ago I was your regular Pta citizen. I relished the long walks through Arcadia on my way to school, I enjoyed seeing its colourful  people as they went on their merry way trying to make a living from their inventive sweet stalls and chicken dust stands, I loved walking past the park on Park Street with its homeless people who read newspapers and the drug dealers that blend in so well with the rest of society but mostly I loved being a citizen of Arcadia because it was the safest I had felt in a long time after my incidents in Sunnyside. Then I got mugged. My whole esteem is so unsure of itself right now. I went out for the first time by myself yesterday to catch the school bus and I thought I would have a mild heart attack! Everyone, according to me, looked like they wanted to attack me, every street corner suddenly looked too dark and dodgy and even the park looked threatening, yes with its swings and all. I love to joke about my mugging experience to friends and family in hopes that the shame and fear will leave me soon but the truth is I am terrified to go anywhere by myself, just the mere thought of getting out the door to face a possible attack grips at my heart with such intensity that I need to collect myself before going out. Half the time I just want to break out into tears and I now obsess about that Sunday I got mugged, could I have done something different to protect myself? I knew I was not over the incident when I went to dance practice on the 18^th June. Practice had been cancelled but I had not gotten the memo because I had forgotten my other phone at the flat. As I approached the venue I saw no cars and immediately I want half crazy, I was not safe and that dirty guy calling out to me was not making me feel better. I hid in a store just to calm my nerves and after much deliberation I went back to the flat. Today again I have to call on every superhuman power I posses because I have an important errand to run and hope my armpits do not fail me as I sweat when I feel threatened or nervous. My boyfriend says that there a certain things that only happen to certain people like his friend who got kidnapped for no reason, was beaten up in the car and then dropped off...I hope getting mugged is not the thing that happens to me.

Where did it all go wrong...?

The greatest moments are the unexpected ones

I truly think planning for anything is a recipe for disaster. Look at me and my good friend Zola. We had planned that last weekend was going to be an all girls party weekend with mini adventures along the way, we planned on this weekend being one filled with late nights at the clubs and alcohol in our systems but our expectations were soon shattered by reality,  ladies and gentle people. Friday night: That must have been the most fun we had this weekend, we went to dance practice, we had a mini road trip to Zo’s boyfriends house where three taxis left us on our way to Zo’s flat, had a lovers’ quarrel with Zo and we watched television with KFC in our mouths and sleep in our eyes. Saturday was meant to be THE day my people. The day of dressing up and eating foot (go ja loto), the day I would rid Zo of her fear for eye make-up and the day I would, for the first time experiment with eye shadow BUT this is what happened: I went to the mall and died over things I could not afford so I got some nail polish and eye shadow instead, Zo and I took a road trip to Silverliakes to pick up a friend and I got motion sickness on the way to and from our destination and of course the fact that our KFC evening totally obliterated our finances meant that Saturday night was going to be a night in with a bottle of wine at least. This is not the first time this planning strategy of mine has not worked, in fact, if I my memory serves me correctly planning only works in the academic sense. You want to be rich, you plan, you want to get an A on that exam, you plan and if you want to be leave your mark on the world, you plan. I believe now that happiness is something you cannot plan, all the little things life has to offer that put a spring in your step you simply stumble upon. You cannot plan to have a great time, you must just let life happen and by all means avoid motion sickness-totally uncool. Now fast forward to Sunday and there is sadness in Zo’s flat as she gets some terrible news. I feel so helpless around her and I silently beat myself for not trying hard enough to give her the Saturday night of her life and say a silent prayer for her heart to heal. After leaving Zo’s place I decided to walk home instead of taking a taxi, I mean Arcadia is pretty close from Hatfield. Biggest mistake of my life-I got mugged for, wait for it, a record seventh time. My fourth cellphone is taken and the two hundred rands I need for my dermatologist appointment is also taken but the worst is my fear is back, I thought I was safer here than when I was in Sunnyside but life is teaching me other things and I now trust nobody. Writing really makes it feel better. Lol, my boyfriend and I made plans to go to Gold Reef City on June 16 and after all the let downs I have had with planning I look forward to seeing how our trip is going to unfold. Till next time-take care of you and yours! Mwah!

VARUSHKA-My winter blanket, my weave.

Yes, I always, without fail, pose like this lol

So I have a weave...here is her story. Varushka and I met under stressful situations.I had a game performance and desperately needed a quick-fix hair do and she had been imprisoned in her packaging for a long time without a head to call her home. I would say that we both needed a friend. I went to the salon a lil apprehensive, I have not had weave in over a year and was not sure if I would make the right hair choice. The salon owner greets me warmly, of course he does lol, and we proceed to talk hair. He brings me three samples and immediately I fell in love with all fourteen inches of Varushka's awesomeness!!! She is soft to the touch, has a sun-kissed brown highlight and she reminds me of spring and sun dresses. I must have her. Now this is where I realize that I am an amateur weavist-the salon owner tells me that I will need to use two packets of Varushka and it will set me back a good R480.00. LMAO, any one in their right mind would have seen through the lie immediately. Firstly, fourteen inch weaves in a single packet alone will cover your head and you will still have a little bit extra to make a skirt, so imagine how much of a struggle it was to try fit all two packets on my head?! The poor hairstylist was being tasked the hardest trying to weave twenty eight inches of hair on my  head and mind you I do not have the smallest head but we ran out of surface area fast. Fast forward to two weeks later and these are the pros and cons of trying to wear twenty eight inches of hair; Winter cannot touch you lol, instant glamour and I never struggle to get dolled up when going out, boyfriend has a new toy to play with and I am a total camera whore lol-facebook will be forever changed with my influx of uploads. On the other hand, I take hours to get to sleep at night because that is the only time Varushka itches like mad, I had to move the bang from the right hand to the left because it gives me terrible headaches when I catch Varushka out the corner of my eye,and boyfriend complains that new toy is leaving its DNA everywhere-this hair breaks the realest. The long and short of it is that me and my Varushka live in a symbiotic love-hate relationship. She has cut down my preparation time by half and I make it on time to my meetings and I have a companion to whip back and forth in the clubs. The beginning of a long and beneficial relationship perhaps?